If nothing else

You can rely on silly progressive organizations to come up with some pretty stupid, hilarious stuff.

From: MoveOn.org
Re: Dems to take back the House come midterms Nov. 2



That elephant looks terrified. I rest my case.

Recent music news, upcoming releases: the uselessness of it all

"Dismemberer-turned-Hellfire Travis Morrison proved that a stupid zero for his solo outing couldn't stop him from doing what he does better than Pitchfork does what it does." Damn straight, Mr. Christgau.

Stream this and prepare yourself. Face? Meet Rock. Rock? Meet Face.

I love it when the Mars Volta is about to release a record, and they give their reasoning and thoughts about/around it to the press straight raw and undiluted and stuff like this comes out. These guys are fucked up and brilliant. Like most bands talking about a record, they don't bother talking about its content and trying to describe it. They just talk about context and subtext. I like that! This article made me check out season one of "Night Gallery," which I've been meaning to see for a while, from my local library.

Sparklehorse going in a pop direction for the new record? Thank God. I had great expectations and got disappointed, mainly by the sparse instrumentation and weirdo vocals, by "Good Morning, Spider". Maybe this record (the title is way too long, so I'll just link) will hit me in a better place.

I knew it!

Didn't I call it?! Didn't I?!

To be fair, he's handling the whole "coming out" thing pretty well...

American Apparel is the devil!

I just spent way too long looking at boobs at American Apparel's website. To be fair, to prove that I'm not entirely a gawking, navel-gazing (literally!) pervert...



I was also checking out these nubile young hipster girl's asses, too. Less perverted.

I recently got into a discussion re: how when you visit P4K, the AA banners seriously look like porn, therefore making P4K and all indie music sites (Stereogum, Pop Matters, etc.-- most of whom carry some sort of AA banner) partially illicit, asocial porn. Many a-time a woman has looked over my shoulder, when I'm reading innocently about music geekery on a public computer, and accused me of looking at porn. The "P" word, of course, makes everyone within an earshot prarie dog up from their sonambulist, glowing-monitor world of MySpace or online games.

"Music geeks aren't interested in sex," I mean to say to these women while looking them in the eye, but instead just stammer something reassuring, informative, sarcastic and hopefully witty with the word "no" in it. "We love the idea of it," I mean to say, "and we'll get the rare chance to indulge every once in a while, but overall its not something we inconvenience ourselves to do."

In a word, "no."

Then I want to ask them: "Why do women think men are looking at porn all the time?" And even if we are sometimes, so the fuck what?

This is all American Apparel's fault. Damn you American Apparel! Do not turn my thoughts to wanderlust!

The best indie-rock open letter of all time

From Tiny Mix Tapes news:

Dear Indie Rock Boys of the World,

We know that tight jeans and faded T-shirts are the height of fashion for all hip twenty-somethings these days. Similarly, we understand that it just isn't cool to smile or chat or otherwise interact with your audience. It goes without saying that goofy dancing is certainly unwelcome. With all due respect, we'd like to suggest that you reconsider these precepts for the following compelling reasons:

1. There is nothing better than matching costumes. Anyone who denies this fact has either no sense of humor or no soul, probably both. Sometimes our entire band wears outfits knitted from multicolored yarn. Pants, shirts, dresses, the whole deal. And though it may get a little toasty onstage, I know you'll agree that we look totally hot. (For more on matching costumes, see also: Le Tigre, Chicks on Speed)

2. Performing is fun. If you don't think so, get off the goddamn stage. Your audience is presumably there because they're into you. I know it's hard, but we recommend cracking a smile at least once during a performance.

3. Some music is good for dancing. Some isn't. Ours is, and the only thing better than matching costumes is DANCING in matching costumes.

We hope that, since we represent a form of music (sometimes known as "experimental rock") that happens to receive a lot of credit in the world of boy-rock, you will consider our proposed revisions to the Indie Rock Constitution. Because hey, if you put on a cute ensemble and shake that skinny ass a bit, you may even get laid.

Love,
Erase Errata

cc: The Gossip

...

posted by judy ain't no punk

Hey... someone had to say it.

Greg Dulli cannot be fucked with right now!

This Onion A.V. Club interview shows Dulli at an even more tough and Zen-like place than he was in this summer's FADER peice. (Warning: Large PDF file ahead with that one.)

And if you haven't heard "Powder Burns," easily one of this year's best records, and I haven't lectured you on how good it is, DO IT NOW!

WHAT?!

THIS is how the greatest American drama of all time was originally concieved?! That sonofabitch...

One of the best "West Wing" reflections I'll ever read, even better than Gerald Ensley's commentary on the series' end (which you can't access online for free anymore, damnit), is this Miami Herald peice by Connie Ogle. She says so much with so few words, when I've used so many more, in a much clumsier fashion about this show.

By the way, want to venture into something really terrifying, or at least kind of disconcerting? Even I'm not this crazy about "The West Wing." There's "West Wing" fan fiction now! It EXISTS! While there's no way it can stand up to the actual show, or capture the voices of some of the characters perfectly, some of it is written pretty darn well, or at least intellegently.

And, yes, I did read some, and, no, I won't link to what I have read, because its shameful enough just to admit that I've read some in the first place.

Best from around the web

This hilarious shit, this cool-as-hell shit and this moving shit.

I'm going to bed.

BOOKMARK THIS!

Go looking for small, local record stores when you travel through the U.S. or abroad? Check this great map that already, over a couple of weeks, has five pages of independent record stories in North American and European major cities. Keep an eye on this. It will grow fast.

Ken Burns:

The New York Times has an article on the FCC controversy surrounding "The War," the long-awaited (when are Ken Burns' docs not long-awaited?) Burns (that's what I'm calling his films from now on, "Burns," because they're beyond documentaries, films, miniseries or even epics, they're just "Burns") documents a "soldier's eye-view of World War II," according to the NYT story.

He's never taken on any disinteresting, or uninteresting, topic, in my eyes. The dude even made me curious about the Civil War, which always took a backseat to curiosity about the Revolutionary War, for me. Taken in slow, measured doses, his work is some of the finest in documentary, or hell even creative non fiction, history.

The particular controversy alluded to in the NYT story is regarding the Burns' "salty language appropriate to discussions of the horrors of war." Burns just shows what he shows and doesn't mean any unseemingly material as vulgar, just as accurate and nakedly true. The FCC, naturally, is as pesky about obscenity complaints nowadays as a hoodrat is ordering dine-in at a Chick Fil A (EXACTLY half lemonade, half fruit punch? EXACTLY? Only quarter-filled with ice? You must be out of your goddamn mind...)

ANYWAY, my thoughts were pretty much expressed in the last two graphs of the story.

As for 'The War,' [Margaret Drain, the vice president for national programs at WGBH in Boston,] called it 'the perfect test case for the F.C.C., because who's going to take on veterans of this country who put their lives at risk for an honest, just cause?'

'It’s not pornographic; it’s not scatological,' she said. 'It’s an emotional expression of a reality they experienced, and it’s part of the historical record.'

"The War" hasn't yet shown up on his IMDb filmography, which surprised me a lot. Usually IMDb is up on these things. I'm pretty stoked now that I know about it.

In other TV documentary news: Spike Lee isn't even bothering to release his Katrina documentary to theaters, though I figured Inside Man's relatively high gross might allow him to do that. HBO produced it, so most people (including me) won't even see it until it hits DVD. I hope he ships it to film festivals near the coast, though, so displaced New Orleanians can see this movie in a theater, together.

One of the greatest freestylers I've ever heard

Is a reigning champion on 106 and Park's Freestyle Friday. This is his space. Watch those freestyle videos. Holy shit.

I mean, holy shit. Anyone who said New York hip hop is dead (as, perhaps, evidenced by this year's Hot 97 Summer Jam) needs to hear this guy freestyle. That stuff must have been written...

Here's my favorite example of him CRUSHING EVERYONE IN HIS PATH:



If I can YouTube his freestyle earlier this afternoon on 106P, I will. It was so, so good. Better than this, even.

Your 'oh snap!' quote of the day is brought to by...

^This picture is so ill. He looks like he's channeling Hendrix, Page, SRV and Slash all at the same time, somehow.

Anyway, its brought to you by Jack White disparaging hipsters as an institution (I see you, Gilmo!). Its in the next-to-last paragraph in this recent NME news story.

God bless Jack White who, Gilmo has brought to my attention, still looks diminuitive next to the freakishly tall Status, who, to my recollection, actually made a brief appearance in the White Stripes' video for "The Denial Twist" (YouTubed here -- keep in mind this is a Michel Gondry video, so if you think your video is fucked up, trust that its not)

An e-mail from the Tallahassee Cultural Resources Commission

Yes, Tallahassee has a Cultural Resources Commission. If you think that seems inessential, it won't after you read this e-mail... or at least until the possibilities of this e-mail are fulfilled.

Addendum: CRC Weekly Email Blast for July 21, 2006

(A service of the Cultural Resources Commission)

CRC ANNOUNCEMENTS

On Tuesday, August 22 at 6:00 p.m. the Leon County Commission is holding a public hearing on the addition of a fifth-penny bed tax for the Performing Arts Center, offering members of the public a chance to voice their opinions. The Performing Arts Center project has asked us to be sure the cultural community is informed of this opportunity to come and be counted. They have told us they are aware that the hotel industry is planning on attending in large numbers to be sure they are heard. Project leaders would like to see those who will be most directly affected by the presence of a new performing arts facility— you, the artists and audiences— attend in large numbers as well, perhaps in costume, or with instruments in hand. This Public Hearing will be held in the Leon County Courthouse, Board of County Commissioners Chambers.


Clint LeMoyne Riley
Cultural Resources Commission
2222 Old St. Augustine Rd.
Tallahassee, FL 32301
(850) 224-2500
clint@netcrc.org
http://www.netcrc.org

If you're around, you should attend this meeting. For serious.

Uhhh....

Ok, so... I don't know where to begin. First off, this is one of those choppy-edited video/audio mashups where everything looks really weird and fucked up. Second, it involves President Bush and U2. Third, its some strange play on "Sunday, Bloody Sunday" where... I think you get the idea.

At first, this actually inspired me like: "Wow... Bush actually said those words. That's so moving." Because the editing, in some moments, is really fluid (compared to most of these things, at least) and you can almost convince yourself he's saying all of that, that passionately, about the Iraqi occupation or the administration's policies. Almost.

At first I felt moved, then I felt sort of sick like: "Oh God I actually believed this for a second, I'm a terrible person" then I thought, "Oh God what if he actually IS that passionate about what he's saying?" Then I thought that its probably Donald Rumsfeld and not the President whose that serious. And then I had a begruding respect for all the people who, if they'd watched that video, would be all "GOD BLESS 'MERICA WE GOTS TO FIGHT THEM TERRISTS! GET ER DONE!"

Yeah, so now I'm just numb, so... Yeah.

Do yourself a favor, don't watch it for more than a minute.

One of these things is not like the other...

ONE OF THESE PEOPLE JUST DOESN'T BELONG!

Paul, just shut up already...

This is the remix...

Actually, this is just a list of my Top 10 Singles of the '06 First Half. Checkity check it before you miss out and wreckity wreck it:

10. Panic! At the Disco - "I Write Sins, Not Tragedies" -- You know what? Shut up. This is an amazing song. You probably know it as the "haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?" song, whereas 15 year-old, jailbait chicks know it as "that one song by those hot guys." Either way, this song is amazing. Emo? Meet hyper emo. My one guilty pleasure pick on this list.

9. Christina Aguilera - "Ain't No Other Man" -- Definitely a worthy successor to "Crazy in Love," as every music critic everywhere has said. Now its Xtina's turn, distilling blazing horns (Herbie Hancock, holla at your girl!) and a DJ Premier beat into what is, maybe, the pop jam of the summer, if not for that garbage "Promiscuous Girl" song. Funny how Nelly, a girl circa 2000 you thought would be singing a more daring pop song like "Ain't No Other Man," does the booty-grind dance pop jam that Xtina would've done in '03. Funny, ain't it? I just want to go on record as giving a big "fuck you" to Nelly Furtado's ever-changing, Timbaland-controlled performance persona. Nelly: Fuck you. You're as fake as Ashlee Simpson, yet people somehow believe you're more "real," or whatever. Go away, please.

8. T-Pain - "Dancefloor" -- Ok, so maybe it's just a Tally thing (which would make sense), but I cannot stop hearing T-Pain's third single off of "Rappa Ternt Sanga" around town. I'm only assuming that its played this often, or almost this often, everywhere else on "urban"-marketed radio stations. That's just me. I'm just sayin'... This song is amazing, though, I'm for serious. "I got the hat, I got the shoes, I got the outfiiit..."

7. AFI - "Miss Murder" -- You know a song that, when you first hear it, you think: "Oh my God this song is amazing! Who the hell made this!" and then you, without the cues of context or intent surrounding the content, make guesses and judgements about the song. "This sounds like an Against Me! joint!" and "What a fucking sing-a-long chorus!" or "Is this Placebo and the reunited Misfits collaborating with H.I.M.?" Well, no. It's AFI with a song I've been waiting for them to do since I first heard "The Art of Drowning." It was a good record and AFI are a decent band live and on record, and their gimmick was so their's just... They never made an anthem to solidify all that. THIS is their anthem. And it's amazing. Talking to certain people about this song, I feel a little ashamed liking it so much, after they point it out its such a pompous song, but really I don't care. It fucking rocks, and that's all there is to it.

6. T.I. - "What You Know" -- I think you're just going to have just nod in agreement with this one. There's not really much I can do to explain this... "Front Back," just released to some urban radio stations, is better (because of that UGK stank dro, son!) and "Ride Wit Me" is equally good (though that peaked lat year) are also good here, too. You just can't deny Tip right now.

5. Young Dro/Joc - "It's Goin' Down" -- Um... Where is this song NOT playing right now? Funny story: Once, on a bus, I heard a girl no older than six chanting the chorus to this song. It was cute and disturbing at the same time. Welcome to the South, playa.

4. Gnarls Barkley - "Crazy" -- You know its funny... "Crazy" was unstoppable midsummer. I couldn't do anything around anywhere and not hear it. Now, it's... well... where is it? Not a great song, but I've grown to like it a lot.

3. The Secret Machines - "Lightning Blue Eyes" -- The one great song on "Ten Silver Drops" is hopefully a sign of things to come for today's greatest American rock trio. Like the perfect combination of U2 and Rush with rollicking drums (like all that Krautrock crazyness, it's perfect for going down a road of some kind!), I've lost count on how many times I've played this song and rocked out to it.

2. Rainer Maria - "Catastrophe Keeps Us Together" -- This is MY summer jam. Definitely the best indie-rock single I'll hear all year. Rainer Maria have made the female-based U2 song that U2 could never find a chick to sing... or something. Wow, that was a really unweildy description.

1. Rick Ross - "Hustlin'" -- Ok, seriously, if you haven't heard this song, you're probably not alive. There is no other option for jam of the summer. THIS is the jam of the summer. "WHIP IT - WHIP IT - REAL HARD!"

They should just change the name of LSD to 'LSyd'

My obituary of Syd Barrett which, yes I wrote for a journalism class, is below. Like you need to read another...

It borrows liberally from the wonderfully-done New York Times obit by Jon Pareles

Syd Barrett, a Founder of Pink Floyd, Dies at 60

Pink Floyd is one of the most influential, most-selling rock bands of all time. Their original lead singer and founding member, Roger Keith "Syd" Barrett, died July 7 at his home in Cambridgeshire, England. He was 60.

He sung on two of the band's first records, "Piper at the Gates of Dawn" and "Saucerful of Secrets," on which he wrote most of the songs. He eventually left the band due to persistent mental problems due to, what many close to him have said, experimentation with a wide array of drugs, including psychotropics such as LSD. He has spent most of his career after Pink Floyd and the release of his solo records as a recluse.

"His death was confirmed by a spokesman for his former band, Doug Wright of LD Communications," the story reads. "[He] did not give a cause. Mr. Barrett had long suffered from diabetes."

Pink Floyd's reminiscent 1975 release, "Wish You Were Here"-- their second most-notable release next to the all-time record holder for catalog sales "Dark Side of the Moon"-- was dedicated to the band's lost mate. Mr. Barrett even showed up on one of a studio session to sing background vocals on one track, "Shine On, You Crazy Diamond." It has also been said that 1973's "Dark Side," which the band has explicitly said deals with themes of "insanity," was also about Mr. Barrett's descent away from the world and away from his band mates and best friends in Pink Floyd.

Before he did, however, he made two great records, including their debut, which is indisputably held up by critics and fans as a rock 'n' roll classic.
"Pink Floyd made its debut album at Abbey Road Studios," the story reads, "as the Beatles worked on 'Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band' next door."
"For someone with such a brief career, Mr. Barrett has never been forgotten," the story reads. "[Musicians] have long tried to emulate his twisted craftsmanship, paying tribute in songs like Television Personalities' 'I Know Where Syd Barrett Lives.' Sir Tom Stoppard’s new play, 'Rock ’n’ Roll,' invokes him as a lost free spirit." The story also reads: "Mr. Barrett became a touchstone for experimental pop musicians.

"Mr. Barrett’s survivors include a brother, Alan, and a sister, Rosemary."

If you're going into the music biz to make money...

Don't bother.

From Billboard:

Even in death, Johnny Cash is still mighty enough to top The Billboard 200. "American V: A Hundred Highways" earns the Man in Black his first No. 1 album since 1969's "Johnny Cash at San Quentin" with 88,000 copies sold in the United States, according to Nielsen Soundscan ... Though the top debut is a great posthumous achievement, the Rick Rubin-produced "American V" sold the fewest copies of a No. 1 debut since Nielsen SoundScan began tracking data in 1991. The previous low for a No. 1 debut belonged to Destiny's Child's "#1's" in 2005, which started with 113,000.

Seems awfully, awfully low right? Here's why. This has got to be the worst week for music industry's sales since the Napster era:

At 9 million units, overall CD sales were down 6% from the previous week and down a whopping 15% compared to the same week a year ago. Sales for 2006 are down 5% compared to 2005 at 179.6 million units.

Five percent decreases are becoming the norm for the major-label music industry now. As early as 2001, the music industry has seen drops in yearly sales as large as six or seven percent. 2006 is on the way to make that even larger. That's why labels are treading old ground (which is why the Man in Black is selling records) and new, young previously-indie acts are getting signed, because major labels have absolutely no clue what their consumers want anymore.

Screw Pitchfork.

They just gave Anathallo's "Floating World" a bottom-barrell rating for no good reason: they don't sound enough like Sufjan Stevens (who is apparently so awesome even his B-sides are above-average-- though AMG's Stephen Thomas Erlewine would certainly disagree), they're too prog, too overreaching, too ambitious.

What's more, Gorilla VS. Bear agrees with me (he culls together some great opinions, relatively diverse except for "Rubies" showing up at least three times), on the best records of the year so far here

And is this P4K's lead when one of the greatest, most eccentric frontmen in rock 'n' roll history dies? Is this the first thing that comes to your, or anyone else's mind? "The recent death of Syd Barrett will lead to talk about his drug abuse, his retreat from music, and his legend."

A complete lack of condolence or even emotion, much less AP style (though I suppose that's hardly among P4K's concerns-- in addition to, y'know, having a soul).

'Oh SNAP!'

Here it is.... pictorally. WITH LINKS!!!!

Top 5 (TEN! OH SNAP TEN!) Records of the '06 First Half:

IN ORDER

10.
9.
8.
7.
6.
5.
4.
3.
2.
1.

If I were a rich man...

...Or if I danced.

What? You thought this was going to be a post about Fiddler or somethng? I'm not THAT Jewish...

But if I owned a club or venue in NYC and were a rich, media-savvy jew (because Yahweh knows there aren't enough of those in the Big Apple), I'd totally buy this dope-ass shit.

An (relatively) open letter to Paul Thomas Anderson

Dear Mr. Anderson,

First: thank you. Your films are deep, moving and have affected me greatly. My favorite of your films is "Magnolia," about which I have some questions, specifically about its music and, of course, the film itself. I'm almost at a loss for words, which is rare for me, to say the least. I have so much to tell you and ask you.

I know you were only in your late 20s when you made "Magnolia," a work I'm sure many have told you was far beyond your years in filmmaking and maturity, breadth and scope. What, if anything concrete, inspired you to write this screenplay? The numerous biblical references therein? How did you get this cast, a cast of superstars and unknowns, together?

Second: as I write this, you are married with child to Maya Rudolph (congratulations, by the way)-- your comments on "Magnolia"'s soundtrack liner notes, in this context, are quite interesting. You say Aimee Mann's songs pose the questions: "How can anyone love me?" and "Why would anyone love me?" and "Why would I love love anyone when all it means is torture?" I am assuming that these questions are accurate representations of your interpretation of her work, I am aware that you were also much younger (hard to believe, but you started making "Magnolia" almost a decade ago) and I am also aware that around this time you ended a seemingly serious relationship. Since that time, you've made another excellent movie, "Punch Drunk Love," completely unlike "Magnolia" in every way. How do you answer those three aforementioned questions at this point in your life? Was "Magnolia" a darker place for you, personally or professionally, in the writing process? I know, from watching the DVD extras, that you isolated yourself in a cabin in the woods in Vermont somewhere. What was the process for "Punch Drunk Love," was it different?

To put it more poignantly, did you "wise up," like Mann said in one of her songs, and start living a better life?

Third: What kinds of obstacles have you had to overcome, particularly as a young filmmaker, not going to film school? I heard you got into New York University's film school and dropped out in only a couple of days, got your tuition money back and made your first short film. Is this true, first off, and second, if so, do you look back as feeling brave or scared? Both? How many times, since you started making films, were you told that you were no good, or that you wouldn't have enough mass appeal? Were you discouraged often? I am glad you are here, with us (that is to say "your audience"), today. I'm sure you are, too.

I've noticed quite a bit of Robert Altman-like techniquein your films, so its so surprise that he's been a mentor to you over the past couple of years. Are there any other key filmmakers, musicians (Mrs. Mann or Jon Brion, who I know greatly inspired "Magnolia") or other artists who have influenced and/or inspired you in some way?

Fourth: This is somewhat critical purely for the sake of balance, why haven't you been more prolific with your work in the last decade? This is mostly out of a selfish concern for my own viewing entertainment, but partly because I think the absolute best filmmakers worldwide, in the history of film are balanced well between quality and quantity-- in the past decade or so you've released three or four full-length films. Regardless of timing, number or semantics, filmmaking is hardly a race and I, of course, understand that, but fine directors like Richard Linklater and Wong Kar-Wai have put out that many films in half that time. Again, this is a nakedly selfish request, but could you please put out films faster? Maybe I should talk to your studio, instead?

Fifth, and finally, I want to emphasize just how much "Magnolia" has meant to me. When I first saw this movie, it was right before my father neared his final complications of cancer-- I rewatched the movie more than a year after his death, thinking that it would be too intense for me to handle watching it at all, and the scenes with T.J. Mackey and his estranged father were a brutal, unrelenting catharsis for me. I stared my emotions right in the eye and it wasn't as terrifying as I thought it would be. I think one of the many things "Magnolia" has taught me is that the inevitable never really is. This kind of redemption and love moved me so deeply I find myself, again, at a loss for words. Tom Cruise, whose movies I normally avoid, is a triumph in this film. Phillip Seymour Hoffman, whose character is easily sympathizable, and Jason Robards-- whose portrayal of a dying man haunted me for sometime and whose death after the wrapping of the film haunted me even more-- had extremely well-done, realistic scenes together. For most of the long, long movie, I forgot I was watching anything. I thought I was living the movie. In a way, I was.

Again, a million thank yous for your wonderful films. Keep doing what you're doing, (just do it faster).

New York City scares the shit out of me

This is why I don't want to live in New York. When 9/11 happened and I was an idealist high school senior, I wanted to move to New York and, y'know, do something. I loved the city. Now, the furthest north I'll go is D.C., because at least I know, there, security is super-tight.

God bless our intellegence agencies.

Government always complains that our intellegence victories are private and defeats public (public, and shameful, as anything can be, actually). The overwhelming media coverage of the foiled Holland Tunnel proves that axiom wrong-- for once, anyway.

I once went through the Holland to get to Newark out of NYC. Saw a lot of Springsteen stickers on cars there. I can only imagine the disaster that would occur if that thing collapsed and got flooded-- all those people...

My 100th post!

I'd like to thank all my fans...

Or not.

Staying hot on the beat of what the former members of Q and Not U are up to, John Davis (former drummer and Q multi-instrumentalist) is unleashing his peppy Motown-esque pop group called Georgie James on tour, opening for the equally-spritely pop goodness of Camera Obscura (who have some great pop music out themselves called "Let's Get Out of This Country"). P4K actually called Davis and his project's female collaborater "awfully adorable," though I have no idea what that has to do with their music. She is hot, though.

In related, and old, news: Q lead singer Chris Paul Richards has released some music, too, here at his MySpace page, under the moniker Ris Paul Ric (get it?).

I didn't know Bill Frist had a country music career...

Seriously, Glen Campbell and the M.D. that can't give a straight answer whether or not sweat and tears can trasmit HIV should go on tour. It would go over huge in Bush country.

Wait... where is that, again?

Ken Lay will not be missed

Ken Lay has been dead for a minute, now, so its about time to theorize conspiracies as to how and why he died. Athens blogger dude I met there, but whose blog I just heard of? Take it away...

Briefs, bitches

MTV News' Ozzfest kickoff report has one of the best, most raw descriptions of a heavy metal show I've ever seen. Chris Harris, MTV News' resident metal expert, is really repping for all things heavy at MTV, of all places. This is the same place that fired Ian Robinson.

Lil' Wayne and Juelz Santana will have the most playfully rhymed rap release ever, whether they release their upcoming project as a mixtape or a proper LP.

Somehow, Judas Priest is going to release a record that is ambitious, metal and gay. In all seriousness, I've thought about a heavy-metal musical for a long, long time, and that if anyone would do it, it would be Rob Halford. Sure enough, the gay did it. God bless heavy metal. (Note to MTV News: Bad call on that Halford picture)

"A Scanner Darkly" is finally coming out this week. It's about damn time. Richard Linklater is such a slacker. He's only releasing two films this year. Check out this English-as-a-second-language IMDb user comment on the movie. I'm sure his other movie, "Fast Food Nation," will be mostly "indie movie," liberal bullshit that will preach to the choir, but "A Scanner Darkly" (another no-doubt fine Phillip K. Dick adaptation) should at least be exciting. It better be, he turned down a Harry Potter movie to do the movie.

Columnists should lead this country

This recent passage from the wonderful today's Leonard Pitts column brought tears to my eyes:

Most of all, [global warming] made me think about a note I once received from a reader, taking me to task for not writing about the environment. I paraphrase, but the most memorable passage said essentially this:

'You are an intelligent man, yet you are not terrified. Therefore, you must not know.' The writer went on to sketch out a vision of doomsday not unlike that in Vanity Fair. It stayed with me:

'You are an intelligent man, yet you are not terrified.'

I'm not an environmentalist. My car takes unleaded. I seldom recycle. And I'd be the first to admit that the doomsday images feel absurdly alarmist. The ice caps melting? New York under water? Get real. That's not going to happen, right? How could that happen? It'll never happen.

In that, it occurs to me that I am -- we are? -- missing the signature lesson of the signature American disasters of the millennium. We often talk about Hurricane Katrina and 9/11 in terms of failures: failures of intelligence, failures of planning, failures of communication.

But these catastrophes were first and foremost failures of imagination. Did we know that a major hurricane could destroy New Orleans? Yes: It was even part of the tour guides' spiel. Did we know that terrorists wanted to bring down the World Trade Center towers? Yes: They made a credible attempt in 1993.

And what did we do with what we knew? Nothing.

Quick note

I've seen less than 100 of IMDb's 250 best movies ever. Some interesting notes from skimming the 250:

"The Godfather" is still at number one, damnit.

"The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King" is at number four, which is a pleasant surprise.

At number 10? Gay.

"The Incredibles" at number 85? Nice.

I guess "Crash" is "accurately rated"

"Donnie Darko" must die for being in the top 100. What's next? "Napoleon Dynamite" winning an honorary Oscar?

"Brazil" is drastically underrated among IMDb users. The 225th best movie ever, my ass.

Things that make you go 'hmm...'

From Media Life Magazine:

Online movie fans want a hero--not you, Superman

Here's a sign we're not too impressed with the slate of summer movies Hollywood is offering: A week before promised blockbuster "Superman Returns" premiered, more of us were online seeking out the trailer for 'Spider-Man 3,' which doesn't open until May 2007, than 'Superman.' In fact, most of the most-searched-for trailers are for films that aren’t coming out this year. That's according to Yahoo's Buzz Index from last week, on which 'Superman' did take the No. 2 spot. It also took an estimated $21 million at the box office on its opening day Wednesday, putting it in the top 10 for mid-week premieres. The third-most-popular trailer on Yahoo was for yet another Marvel hero flick, the Nicholas Cage vehicle 'Ghost Rider.' 'Rider' won't be in theaters until February 2007. Rounding out the top five trailers are those for 'Transformers,' due in 2007, and 'Eragon,' due later this year, both fantasy films concerning, respectively, alien races' battle for earth (inspired by beloved 1980s toys) and a farm boy's journey atop a dragon.

I saw "Superman Returns." It was good. The script was disappointing, but the visuals and the super-adrenaline action scenes are really, really great. The "Spiderman 3" trailer, teaser, whatever you call it, was beforehand, actually. Thinking on it, I was more stoked by that than most of the Superman movie. Just goes to show you...

Isn't this just precious?

Rep. Katharine Harris: I'M THE NEXT SENATOR FROM FLORIDA!!!!

Gov. Jeb Bush: Please tell me she's joking...

Can Billboard.com read my mind?

Why did they put two of my most anticipated releases on their frontpage this morning? Weird.

By the way, if you're a rock band, and you name your first single off your new record "Vicarious Atonement" a couple of months after one of your prog-rock cohorts release a single named, simply, "Vicarious," you look stupid. To say the least. Even stupider, yet awesomer, is the tracklisting for the Mars Volta's new record. Check it:

"Vicarious Atonement"
"Tetragrammaton" (prog!)
"Vermicide"
"Meccamputechture"
"Asilos Magdalena"
"Viscera Eyes" (!!!!)
"Day of the Baphomets"
"El Ciervo Vulnerado"

ADDENDUM: I'd be remiss if I didn't add another upcoming release mention here. Travis Morrison's second solo record was covered by Billboard a while ago, apparently.

What are the other three?

From the The Famuan:

"'I had no idea about the severity of FAMU's problems until I became president,' Bryant said. 'There are four positions in this town people feel they can do better than the person in the position-- and one of those is the president of FAMU.'